...Will probably be the day that one of your parent’s dies. Admit it- you think about it.
I do.
I’m terrified.
A dear friend lost his father a few days ago. I feel ridiculous. I have no idea what to say. I spend time imagining what he must be going through, wondering if there are any words or combination of words in the English language that could possibly offer any solace. Does he feel empty? Alone? Lost?
I hope it is none of these things and that what he feels is surrounded by love and memories of someone dear that will always be with him in some way.
I realize that as a physician, I will have to deal with dying far more than the average person. What words will I be able to offer a patient’s loved ones? What comfort is there in simply, “I am sorry. We did all we could.” ? If I hear those words one day, will I believe them?
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Monday, December 1, 2008
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Well......
I am not sure where to begin. At this stage, I am in Bangalore and will be here for a few days before heading to Delhi on Wednesday.
First, let me address the recent events in Mumbai. I cannot imagine what it must have been like for any of the people directly affected by the attacks. My heart is with them. As a foreigner, it is difficult to feel safe anywhere here. Any time someone asks me where I am from, I say Canada. I am tempted just to try and play a slight accent and say Chandigarh, but with a backpackers pack strapped to my back I think it's a dead giveaway. The first reaction I got earlier today when I told someone who asked me where I was from that I was from Canada was, "Lovely place- peaceful people and lots of natural beauty". I thought to myself, yes my friend that is exactly what i was going for - PEACEFUL place. No Bush administration, no "war on terror", none of the ridiculousness that now comes with being an American.
I am posting a few pictures from Chennai. I am so sorry, I am not writing more, but there is a lot going on and time is short.......more later - I promise : ).
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
The Adventures of Emma & Eddie Eyeball
Allow me to introduce v.1.0 of my newest friends......
Yeah, they're cartoons.
No. No, I'm not having early onset jet lag....
And yes, I made them up. Sure, you can call them my imaginary friends, but they have a purpose - to educate children (maybe even a few adults) about eye health and eye diseases in India. My hope is that Eddie & Emma will successfully accomplish their goal and maybe even have fun along the way.
Sooo, enough about them. I'm leaving in a few hours for Chennai!!! I almost can't believe it accept for the fact that I've been running around all day taking care of last minute packing and random errands (yes mom, I really do need to worry about zits still and yes, I did spray my socks with mosquito repellent : ) ).
I've come to learn that there is an internet cafe right across from the place I am staying in Chennai.....so, dear reader, that means you and I have time to get better acquainted.
Lucky you.
'till next time, from Chennai (by way of Air France)......
Sunday, November 2, 2008
If you were stranded on a desert island and could only take....you know the rest : )
Imagine that you are moving to a tropical island far away from home and you only have 50 lbs worth of "stuff" that you can take with you - what do you bring?
Wait. That's actually happening....
Here's my mother's list on my behalf:
Scrubs
bikini
sublock
and your damn windsufer that's been sitting in the garage for years and since you can't take it on the plane, how about sail it there wearing the bikini with the scrubs over it and the sunblock on your face/in a little bag strapped to your back with some water....have fun kid !!
Crap.
Seriously, everyone has these long lists of things that you are supposed to take that you either can't get on the island at all or are in short supply and guaranteed to run out if you are not one of the first five callers so to speak. We're talking:
bedding
extension cords
ethernet cable
DEET
surge protectors
binders
highlighters
Netter's Anatomy Flashcards
Colored pens/pencils
Printer
Ink Cartridges for above referenced printer
ream of paper for afore mentioned printer
flashlight
toiletries in large supply
Brita
Filters for above referenced Brita
pots & pans
Shall I go on ? I am sure we are well above 50 lbs here and I haven't even listed any clothing or a hair dryer.....hmmmmm.
This is where you guys come in : ). Ya know how you keep mentioning how great it'd be to visit me down there ? How about we make a deal? You come visit and stay in my teeeeeny tiny dorm room free of charge and in exchange bring moi some supplies! You like ? I like.
72 days until I am officially "Marooned".....
Wait. That's actually happening....
Here's my mother's list on my behalf:
Scrubs
bikini
sublock
and your damn windsufer that's been sitting in the garage for years and since you can't take it on the plane, how about sail it there wearing the bikini with the scrubs over it and the sunblock on your face/in a little bag strapped to your back with some water....have fun kid !!
Crap.
Seriously, everyone has these long lists of things that you are supposed to take that you either can't get on the island at all or are in short supply and guaranteed to run out if you are not one of the first five callers so to speak. We're talking:
bedding
extension cords
ethernet cable
DEET
surge protectors
binders
highlighters
Netter's Anatomy Flashcards
Colored pens/pencils
Printer
Ink Cartridges for above referenced printer
ream of paper for afore mentioned printer
flashlight
toiletries in large supply
Brita
Filters for above referenced Brita
pots & pans
Shall I go on ? I am sure we are well above 50 lbs here and I haven't even listed any clothing or a hair dryer.....hmmmmm.
This is where you guys come in : ). Ya know how you keep mentioning how great it'd be to visit me down there ? How about we make a deal? You come visit and stay in my teeeeeny tiny dorm room free of charge and in exchange bring moi some supplies! You like ? I like.
72 days until I am officially "Marooned".....
Thursday, October 16, 2008
The Mind & It's Caverns
“Everything ok?” a voice from the corner of the elevator inquired. If she hadn’t spoken, I wouldn’t have even noticed that she was there because I was so completely absorbed in my own thoughts. I realized that she must have seen me coming out of the same doctor’s office that she had just been in.
“Yes, thank you” I replied. “You?” I felt it was the only appropriate response although I also thought it strange to have been asked about a potentially private matter by a complete stranger in the first place. Boundaries my friends. Boundaries.
“Well, I can’t seem to remember things, so they took a picture of my brain to see if they could figure out why.”
“Oh. Well, I hope it turns out okay” I offered.
“Well, it’s okay if it doesn’t because I won’t remember anyway.” She chirped.
Remarkable.
“Yes, thank you” I replied. “You?” I felt it was the only appropriate response although I also thought it strange to have been asked about a potentially private matter by a complete stranger in the first place. Boundaries my friends. Boundaries.
“Well, I can’t seem to remember things, so they took a picture of my brain to see if they could figure out why.”
“Oh. Well, I hope it turns out okay” I offered.
“Well, it’s okay if it doesn’t because I won’t remember anyway.” She chirped.
Remarkable.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
Endorphins
I admit it; I’ve gotten out of shape. So much so that I had forgotten that rush that comes with a steady flow of endorphins – until today. 20 minutes into cardio and I can’t stop smiling. Come to mamma you beautiful molecules….”Oops, I did it again……” (don’t judge people, you know you love it too)…..”I’m not that innocent.....”
Meanwhile, I’m learning a great deal about the ups and downs of the business world. My poor mother is practically being hacked to death by the big guns in the dairy business. I suspect someone sees her as quite a potential threat to their livelihood. Eat or be eaten people. Sorry, any more details and I’d have to offer you up as chum.
I finally finished the online eye health training course for Unite For Sight. Damn interesting stuff. For example – River Blindness, aka onchocerciasis is a form of blindness caused by a worm that enters your body through a black fly. Yup, I’m not kidding. Here’s how it works….a black simulian fly carrying worm larvae in its saliva bites you, transferring the larvae into your skin. In this palatial atmosphere, they mature into adult worms that appear like nodules underneath your skin. The adults then breed with each other – as adults tend to do – and their babies travel through your beautiful body occasionally reaching your eyes. The spread of the worms causes intense itching. If it so happens that one of these worms should die, which naturally they must at some point, the result is inflammation. Under the circumstance that the location of death was your eyeball, the inflammation causes blindness. Yup. Oh, and they can grow to be up to half a meter in length. Hope you’re not about to have a meal if you are squeamish.
This does lead me to think that I am going to LOVE parasitology. Damn fascinating. On a less gruesome note, I don’t think I mentioned that I reached my fund raising goal !! $1,560 – not too shabby.
Thank you so much to all of you that have made donations! Seriously, someone will be able to see because of you. That’s pretty incredible.
The molecules are flowing....
Meanwhile, I’m learning a great deal about the ups and downs of the business world. My poor mother is practically being hacked to death by the big guns in the dairy business. I suspect someone sees her as quite a potential threat to their livelihood. Eat or be eaten people. Sorry, any more details and I’d have to offer you up as chum.
I finally finished the online eye health training course for Unite For Sight. Damn interesting stuff. For example – River Blindness, aka onchocerciasis is a form of blindness caused by a worm that enters your body through a black fly. Yup, I’m not kidding. Here’s how it works….a black simulian fly carrying worm larvae in its saliva bites you, transferring the larvae into your skin. In this palatial atmosphere, they mature into adult worms that appear like nodules underneath your skin. The adults then breed with each other – as adults tend to do – and their babies travel through your beautiful body occasionally reaching your eyes. The spread of the worms causes intense itching. If it so happens that one of these worms should die, which naturally they must at some point, the result is inflammation. Under the circumstance that the location of death was your eyeball, the inflammation causes blindness. Yup. Oh, and they can grow to be up to half a meter in length. Hope you’re not about to have a meal if you are squeamish.
This does lead me to think that I am going to LOVE parasitology. Damn fascinating. On a less gruesome note, I don’t think I mentioned that I reached my fund raising goal !! $1,560 – not too shabby.
Thank you so much to all of you that have made donations! Seriously, someone will be able to see because of you. That’s pretty incredible.
The molecules are flowing....
Friday, September 12, 2008
The Bug & The Windshield
I know what you are thinking. I couldn't hack it. I'm one of them. Before I was in this position, I thought the same thing. I could go on for pages about how I ended up heading for St. George's Medical School on a lonely caribbean island called Grenada in January, but I hope that's not all you want to know about me. On the other hand, if you are in the same position, I ask you...
Do you remember that first moment when you realized the ultimate fear of almost every pre-med had just come true for you? The Lochness monster of the medical school application process (you were hearing the Jaws theme playing in the background)? That’s right – the Caribbean. Your leg just got chewed off by Jaws and you're hemorrhaging.
However it came to be that you found yourself in this seemingly awful unthinkable situation (for me, it was the MCAT), I say cheers to making the best of it. So, I’m off to St. George’s (aka SGU) on the lovely spice island called Grenada. Let’s see: Great weather, clear blue water, lovely fresh fishies swimming by waiting for the honor of making an appearance later on my dinner plate, cheap diving certification, rum, sailing, snorkeling, close to South America (one must carnivale, no? ), oh and umm, it’s a pretty good medical school too. Did I say rum already? Mojitos anyone?
So For now, I'm in one of those life transition phases. The kind that makes you think "deep" thoughts. I've never been a fan of these phases. When left alone with too much thought I tend to not be able to turn it off, hence the bags under my eyes and current state of snappiness (apologies if you have been a recent victim).
So, how to kill the time between now and January and manage to not only maintain sanity, but get my beauty sleep - you know how I cherish it. A girl my brother used to date dubbed me the "sleeping champion". I wear the title proudly while I still can. But I digress...
Killing time. Yes, going to Chennai, India for the month of November to volunteer for Unite For Sight. I must confess that I'm a bit unsure if this is the right thing to do with the time that I have. On the other hand, I imagine it will give me that feel good feeling as I think my "deep" thoughts about stuff. And if you are in the mood for that "feel good feeling" too, then by all means, let me assist you in achieving a small sampling : ) : http://www.uniteforsight.org/intl_volunteer/pages/?name=Simrun%20Kalra
More on those details later.
Right now, I am back to packing up my lovely condo in Oakland to move back to southern california (whoever made the OC "cool" is not someone I ever want to know).
Do you remember that first moment when you realized the ultimate fear of almost every pre-med had just come true for you? The Lochness monster of the medical school application process (you were hearing the Jaws theme playing in the background)? That’s right – the Caribbean. Your leg just got chewed off by Jaws and you're hemorrhaging.
However it came to be that you found yourself in this seemingly awful unthinkable situation (for me, it was the MCAT), I say cheers to making the best of it. So, I’m off to St. George’s (aka SGU) on the lovely spice island called Grenada. Let’s see: Great weather, clear blue water, lovely fresh fishies swimming by waiting for the honor of making an appearance later on my dinner plate, cheap diving certification, rum, sailing, snorkeling, close to South America (one must carnivale, no? ), oh and umm, it’s a pretty good medical school too. Did I say rum already? Mojitos anyone?
So For now, I'm in one of those life transition phases. The kind that makes you think "deep" thoughts. I've never been a fan of these phases. When left alone with too much thought I tend to not be able to turn it off, hence the bags under my eyes and current state of snappiness (apologies if you have been a recent victim).
So, how to kill the time between now and January and manage to not only maintain sanity, but get my beauty sleep - you know how I cherish it. A girl my brother used to date dubbed me the "sleeping champion". I wear the title proudly while I still can. But I digress...
Killing time. Yes, going to Chennai, India for the month of November to volunteer for Unite For Sight. I must confess that I'm a bit unsure if this is the right thing to do with the time that I have. On the other hand, I imagine it will give me that feel good feeling as I think my "deep" thoughts about stuff. And if you are in the mood for that "feel good feeling" too, then by all means, let me assist you in achieving a small sampling : ) : http://www.uniteforsight.org/intl_volunteer/pages/?name=Simrun%20Kalra
More on those details later.
Right now, I am back to packing up my lovely condo in Oakland to move back to southern california (whoever made the OC "cool" is not someone I ever want to know).
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